Thursday, May 24, 2007

-24th May 2007-

today has totally been a sucky day...... my beloved reds lost the champions league final to A.C. Milan....... waking up with that stuck in my mind was really bad...... however, to pile on the misery, i had to choose my specialized electives for my diploma course...... i did what i thought was the right, sensible and practical thing to do, but after having made my choice, it suddenly dawned on me that i am a useless coward to do what i did. why? because although i proclaimed to everyone that after so many years of doing boring studying subjects, ive had enough and i am going to pick up an elective of pure fun, i didn't do it...... instead i picked one of the electives with the most boring outlook as my first choice just because it is widely acknowledged that with such a qualification, it would be easier for me to get better, more attractive jobs...... what happened to the guy who wanted to make a difference in his life and do something fun for a change? he was swallowed up by the pragmatic or otherwise cowardly side of him, the one who does not have the guts to step out of his comfort zone and really do something different in his life...... all i can say is that i fucking hate myself...... fucking coward i am...... hopefully i won't regret this...... but i can't do anything if it happens that way....... and whoever gives a fuck anyway......


| wish i was dead @ 6:22 AM|

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