Thursday, May 24, 2007
-24th May 2007-
today has totally been a sucky day...... my beloved reds lost the champions league final to A.C. Milan....... waking up with that stuck in my mind was really bad...... however, to pile on the misery, i had to choose my specialized electives for my diploma course...... i did what i thought was the right, sensible and practical thing to do, but after having made my choice, it suddenly dawned on me that i am a useless coward to do what i did. why? because although i proclaimed to everyone that after so many years of doing boring studying subjects, ive had enough and i am going to pick up an elective of pure fun, i didn't do it...... instead i picked one of the electives with the most boring outlook as my first choice just because it is widely acknowledged that with such a qualification, it would be easier for me to get better, more attractive jobs...... what happened to the guy who wanted to make a difference in his life and do something fun for a change? he was swallowed up by the pragmatic or otherwise cowardly side of him, the one who does not have the guts to step out of his comfort zone and really do something different in his life...... all i can say is that i fucking hate myself...... fucking coward i am...... hopefully i won't regret this...... but i can't do anything if it happens that way....... and whoever gives a fuck anyway......
| wish i was dead @ 6:22 AM|
__________
Thursday, May 03, 2007
-decisions-
is it really that difficult to make a decision? i always see the people around me struggling to make decisions for very small things and i wonder...... i mean i definitely am not the best decision maker in the world by any extent, but i make decisions and live with them, good or bad...... i mean, to me, it's better than having to keep track of an unmade decision and getting oneself into all sorts of dilemma...... which brings me to another thing...... i can't understand why the fuck people make decisions based on others' decisions...... eg. are you going to where where where?
: i dunno. if so and so goes, i'll go....... come on man, don't make your lives more complicated than it already is...... even if you may not find it complicated, the organisers would really be pissed by these replies...... and then nobody wants to organise anything and you would go whining about why aren't there any activities when in the first place, you stop all from organising with such replies...... so, a reminder to all including myself, make decisions, stick with them, and in the process, don't be a pain to anyone's ass and in the process make your life and his/her life more fucked up than it already is......
| wish i was dead @ 6:14 AM|
__________
