Friday, March 23, 2007
-family......-
you know the times when certain people feel so much like family to you? the times when you feel that they're the world and nothing else matters as long as they are with you? well, i'm glad to say that in the past year, i have gained 12 of these people...... these 12 who call themselves the point zeroes, are God's gifts to me...... maybe if i dare to make a reference, the 12 apostles....... the intergral part of Jesus and his preaching pretty much revolved and involved the 12 disciples he had...... or at least, that's what i feel...... just in the same way, i guess my life pretty much revolved and involved these 12 the bulk of the time...... they are in the same way as inportant to me as the 12 apostles are to Jesus...... the times of laughter, joy, pain, sadness, stress, disagreements, conflicts...... all of them, every single memory, is important to me...... and as we move towards the courses of our own choices, i can't help but feel these parts that being so important to me, are being taken away...... and at the same time, its killing me to know that what i have dreaded since the 13 of us became close, is finally going to happen...... and as more and more memories of us flashes past my mind at this moment in time, i feel the rims of my spectacles wet...... i am now at a loss for words...... but having written this far, this post only has a message which i can't express in my physical self, my cowardice only allowing me to do this behind a computer screen...... but the message is, no matter what, i love you guys, and it is harder than ever to part ways...... being 19 this year, i guess i should have experienced enough to know that there is no ever ending feast and all that crap, having gone through this so many times...... but though i should have been thought of to have grown up and look through all this, and despite the many times we promised each other to always meet, some part of me and my experiences tell me that these things never happen enough...... thus, perhaps this being my last time speaking to you guys in this medium, perhaps you guys would never come across this site ever again, i really hope you guys see this...... to all of you, thanks for taking care of me, thanks for tolerating whatever nonsense i gave you guys, thanks for scolding me when i needed to be scolded, thanks for the encouragement you guys always gave me that i never heeded, thanks for always being there, thanks for teaching me everything i've learnt from you guys, thanks for a birthday so well planned, thanks for helping me watch my diet, the list of thanks would go on for infinity...... i guess a million thanks would never be enough...... in the same way, i guess a million sorrys wouldn't be enough for what i have done, hurting you guys in a way or another...... i guess i would never be able to repay what you all have done for me...... but if i could put it this way, the very least i could do is to remember you guys forever and be thankful for all of you...... and i would, for like a tatoo, you guys would be etched into my heart, in a painful but happy way...... have a great life, all of you, for you guys definitely deserve it...... take care, all the best in everything and if possible, always keep in contact...... your unworthy friend, Jason, Nosaj, History Rewriter, Bobby, Garfield......
| wish i was dead @ 7:17 AM|
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